You can’t fail adventure

by vmcnelis

Since moving to California I’ve feared having to move back home.  I’ve struggled with finding a job, paying my bills, finding a place to live (I’m currently sleeping on a couch) and really being on my own for the first time ever. I feared moving home mostly because it meant failing. What would my parents think? My friends? And all the people at my going-away party? And most importantly, myself? But today I stopped fearing failure.  I realized I’m on an adventure. And you can’t fail adventure.  I don’t have any set goals or a timeline.  Sure, there are places I want to travel to and other countries I want to move to but I’ll get there when I get there. I can’t be bothered with what other people think if I want adventure.  That takes all the fun out of it. Feeling like I have to get it right ruins the whole point of adventure. There is no right or wrong, I’m just going where life takes me.

When I look back on my life when I’m 73 I don’t want to think “Wow I worked really hard and always paid my bills on time and had great credit”, where’s the fun in that? I want to think “I saw the whole damn world and somehow managed to rub two pennies together to make a nickel along the way” .. or whatever that phrase is. Maybe I made it up. 

Anyhow, despite my struggles over the past few months, I’ve become more confident in myself and my decisions than ever.  The only thing I’m still struggling with is not being able to call him and share my adventures with him.  I’d love to tell him “Hey I’ve got a bed to sleep in for the next two weeks, and I found another great potential place on Craigslist”. Or better yet, having him by my side, sharing every adventure with me.  But I guess that’s what I’ve got this blog for right?